Thursday, July 21, 2005

More data for my testosterone theory

I have long suspected that poor behavior in men is correlated with their testosterone level, in kind of a bitchy man version of PMS. According to Tyler Cabot's piece in the August 2005 Esquire, maybe I'm onto something.

Irritability has been linked to "unhealthily low testosterone levels." Low testosterone may also be tied to depression. High testosterone levels, on the other hand, may make a fella more likely to smoke, drink, fight, and get hurt. Levels shoot up in the morning. Testosterone production gets a boost from a rigorous workout, in moderation; after an hour of exercise, levels start to drop. Sports fans whose teams win experience an increase in testosterone, whereas a losing team's partisans suffer a drop.

Help me with this theory. Do you know a man who pisses you off because he's extra irritable? Or who's cranky in the morning? Or who gets pissy around workout time? Who's totally unbearable when his team wins or when it loses? I can't figure out whether assholery would go along with low or high testosterone levels. I always figured it was high levels that produced the assholery. Mr. Tangerine gets extra-ornery when his team loses (low testosterone), but also tends to be grumpy early in the morning (high testosterone, but confounded by the factor of sleepiness). Let's do some science here, folks!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

the two boys I live with are gamers. I've noticed that they're both pissy when they compromise on something, but that when one performs better than the other, they'll be more agressive and condescending.

But, arguing about testosterone also gets interesting when you take into account the experiences of trans dudes, who have pretty wildly varying results, from what I understand, when they start taking T.

Jeff Janusch said...

Anyone with low blood sugar, regardless of gender, will be irritable. As far as morning pissiness-is that a word?-it may be caused by said mild hypoglycemia, the need for caffeine, or just a plain old fucking sonofabitch beer hangover--especially if you're a rabid sports fan who drinks Bud, Miller, Coors, Old Style or any similar mass produced horse piss. It makes one wonder if testosterone is added to beer sold at sports arenas.