Cool Things

(Not the weather. The weather is quite warm now.)

Cool Thing the First

In Salon Broadsheet, Lynn Harris has written a short essay about legislation that proposes to mandate insurers who cover obstetrical services to also cover IVF and other treatments for infertility. There are some compelling arguments that women/couples with insurance coverage for IVF would be less likely to use turbo-charged injectables and thus less likely to conceive multiples.

Harris includes a parenthetical note linking to an old "Why don't you just adopt?" post of mine:

(Let's get this out of the way: Many people who go down the IVF road get the question, "Why don't you just adopt?" Many of them would like to respond, "Why don't you?")

It's kinda fun to hear new voices chiming in on this topic in the comments lounge. Now, how many of Broadsheet's readers will be keen on reading more...and then discover that I've slacked off on blogging here? Ah, well. These things happen.

Cool Thing the Second

My first New York Times crossword puzzle will be published on Sunday, July 5! I absolutely took the easy way out and made the crossword with a friend who's more savvy about constructing crosswords. I know many people tend to blow off the Sunday paper on a holiday weekend, but getting a puzzle in the Times remains the pinnacle even with a smaller audience. The theme is...not about adoption or fertility treatment. That's the only spoiler I'm giving out.

Poems about me

My Mother's Day gift from Ben was a book of poems he wrote about me. The kids worked on these all week at school, and these poem books—bound with fat yarn—are impossibly cute.

Here's one, called "My Best Mom: A True Exaggeration Poem"

My mom is the best.

She gets A's on every test.

She can do crosswords at light speed.

And lead the Navy in their deed.

Me and dad love you more than the fanciest cars.

But we should all live on mom's planet Mars.

Hey, look! It's May! Time to post again

No wonder my traffic has eroded so woefully—I haven't been keeping up this blog. I'm blogging every day—sometimes twice a day—at my 1⅓ crossword blogs. Between that, an uptick in freelance work, the persistence of the whole laziness/procrastination nexus, Facebook, and Twitter, yeah, I don't take the time here. Sorry. There does seem to be a rash of blogular lethargy these days, though. I can think of at least seven blog pals who have been blogging much less than they used to. Omigod! It must be contagious! Is it a swine writer's block pandemic?

Embodying the cheesiest trope of blogging, I return to whine. Why? Because I have to limit my potassium intake. I think it's more common for people to have low potassium levels and need to take a K supplement, or try to eat more bananas and orange juice. But not me. If I don't consciously minimize the potassium in my diet, the level goes up and increases the risk of cardiac arrhythmia, a.k.a. OMG YOU COULD TOTALLY DIE and you wouldn't even have symptoms. So I cannot mess around. Do you know what foods are particularly rich sources of potassium? I'll tell you:

• Chocolate.
  
• Milk.
  
• Ice cream.
  
• Potatoes in their many delicious forms.
  
• Bananas.
  
• Oranges, orange juice, and their citrus cousins. (Quelle ironie, as we say around here.)
  
• Beans, including the lovely pinto and black and kidney beans as well as the thank-god-I-have-a-health-excuse-to-avoid-them lima beans.
  
• Nuts, including yummy cashews, pecans, pecan pie, and almonds.
  
• Peanuts and peanut butter. Let us not overlook Reese's Peanut Butter Cups.
  
• Dried fruit.
  
• Peaches.
  
• Pears.
  
• Chickpeas and the hummus that's made from them.
  
• Tomatoes and tomato sauce.
  
• Cheese.
  
• Whole-grain bread.
  
• Brown rice.
  
• Spinach and dark leafy greens. (Iceberg lettuce is a better bet.)
  
• A wealth of other fruits and vegetables.
  

What doesn't have a ton of potassium?

• Well, you've got your processed white bread and white rice. You know—the stuff I shouldn't go overboard on if I want to stave off type 2 diabetes, which my dad had.
  
• Beer and wine. Small favors! 
  
• Sugar.
  
• Grease. But not butter! That's dairy, and dairy has potassium.
  
• Meats. I haven't eaten red meat since I was 12, and lots of meat protein can tax impaired kidneys so I don't want to go there.
  
• I think apples and grapes aren't too high in K, at least compared to other fruit. Of course, what fruits are you supposed to eat more of? All those other ones. These ones pretty much deliver sugars and fiber without a lot of phytochemicals, don't they?
  
• Water.
  
• Fritos.
  

Isn't that a pisser? You can imagine what fun it is to shop for groceries or peruse a restaurant menu. Keep in mind that I should also watch my salt intake, and the fun multiplies! Some of my favorite meals and snacks say NO in two or three different ways. I'm going out for Indian food tomorrow, and I lovelovelove channa masala. Why, that's chickpeas galore! With some salt for good measure. How about a little homemade trail mix for a hit of protein—combine (unsalted) nuts, dried fruit tidbits, and chocolate chips. Chocolate ice cream is a two-fer. Mashed potatoes with lots of milk, butter, and sour cream. A tall glass of cold milk. A bowl of sliced bananas in orange juice. Cheese pizza with tomato sauce. Mexican food with beans, cheese, tomatoes, and sour cream.

I really should see a nutritionist for advice. Could some of you hassle me about that so I actually make an appointment with someone? Because this food thang bums me out, and there's no reason to think the dietary restrictions will ease at some point so I could use the help. Anyone in Chicago know a good registered dietitian?

Yes, this entire post is pretty much a big whinefest. Join me, won't you? Tell me what food you can't have. If you're one of those lucky dogs who can eat anything, just lie. I'll be sad if all the comments are "Wow, that's too bad! I love all those foods and eat them several times a day, every day."

The saving gene

So, Ben's ninth birthday is imminent and he's been receiving checks and cash in the mail with his birthday cards. You know what he wants to do with this money? Save it. Put it in his wallet or his savings account and never take it out.

Sure, he'd like to reserve the right to buy any desired loot he doesn't receive as gifts—but he'd like to buy those items with someone else's money. Birthday money that has been given to him immediately ceases to be other people's spendable money and is transformed into Ben's Must-Be-Hoarded Money.

While I applaud the child's inclination to save (aw, he takes after his ma and da), he was completely missing the point of birthday money. I think he understands now that I've laid it out straight and will not ask his parents to buy crap for him right on the heels of receiving more crap than he needs. (And by "crap," I mean "thoughtful gifts," of course.) There will be no post-birthday bailouts for greedy children!

Are you more a saver or a spender?

Life is good

Winter is over, so the seasonal summer beers have returned to the store shelves. I just popped open a Buffalo Bill's Brewery Orange Blossom Cream Ale. Yes, it is an orange-flavored beer. Refreshing, and it totally matches my blog.

I found out I passed the online Jeopardy! test in January (I had 40 or 41 out of 50 answers right), and I get to audition in Chicago on May 28. W00t! I have several weeks to concoct five killer anecdotes/topics. I am open to suggestions here. One blogger friend, Julie, was on the teen tournament back in the day and could only think of four good ones, so she threw in a fondness for disco as her fifth topic—and wouldn't you know it? That's the one Alex Trebek asked her about on national TV. So damn, I need five solids here.

Tomorrow, I'm helping out at a local crossword mini-tournament. I've been asked to give a brief presentation on crossword tips (which you may see in my Twitter feed to the right before they scroll off) and to sign copies of my book if folks are buying them. What should I write? This is my first official book-signing opportunity. The others, mainly of the standing-in-the-hall variety, usually say "Happy solving!" That's lame. Should I switch to "Rock on with your bad self"? Again, I'm open to suggestions but I need them by Saturday morning! Please hurry!

Oh! While I'm on the topic of Me Me Me (obnoxious, ain't I? and just think, I was such a shy and unassuming child), check out the May 2009 issue of Wired magazine. I hear subscribers already have their copies, but I'm still waiting to receive one. The "Mr. Know-It-All" modern-day etiquette column quotes me.

Audience participation time: Tell me something that you're proud of or a reason you're glad springtime is here.

Five things

1. It took three tries to get my almost-9-year-old into a shirt he could abide this morning. First shirt: Tag itches. (The tag is sewn flat, and he has the same shirt in three colors. Wore them all fall and winter without complaint.) Second shirt: The inside of the buttons on the button placket itches. Third shirt: Neckhole tight, hard to pull over head, but he can make do. His primary remnant of sensory integration dysfunction is not liking bumpy sock seams under his toes, but every once in a while, an Itchy Shirt or Lumpy Pants Pockets situation arises.

2. United Airlines is in the news for its new policy concerning obese passengers and seat width, but I don't want to talk about that. I wish to declare this: They should forbid passengers from reclining their seatbacks unless it's a redeye, an overseas flight, or another flight in which many passengers are likely to sleep. No more! Sit up straight and quit invading my personal space, People in Front of Me!

3. New Orleans turns out to be a terrific place for a family vacation. Steer clear of Bourbon Street unless you strive to teach your children about strip clubs and want them to see female nudity, Larry Flynt style, from the sidewalk. But everything else! We filled much of our spring break with the Audubon Experience package—$32.95 for adults, $19.95 for kids. That gets you admission to (1) The Audubon Zoo—a good zoo with a cool Louisiana swamp area (don't miss alligator feeding time), hands-on experiences for kids, and some animals I haven't seen in the Chicago zoos. (2) The Audubon Aquarium. Cool seahorse exhibit, big shark tank (funded by the Gulf of Mexico oil companies—hey, they're good for something), a Mississippi River exhibit, jellyfish, and more. (3) The Insectarium! There are only a few bug museums in the U.S. and this is one of 'em. Creepy live critters, artistic displays of dead ones (picture a swirling rainbow of iridescent beetles and butterflies in lieu of pinned bugs in evenly spaced rows), the opportunity to engage in entomophagy. (4) And an Imax movie, with three movies to choose from. New Orleans also has the streetcars, which mean you don't need a car or cabs to get around. And there's a free ferry across the Mississippi to Algiers Point. If you're wondering about the post-Katrina New Orleans crime wave you've heard about, well, it was not in evidence where we were. We felt safe the whole time.

4. Wow, if you don't eat shellfish or red meat, creole food gets old fast. My menu for the week consisted largely of alternating between fried chicken po'boys and fried catfish po'boys. Mr. Tangerine enjoyed his meals, though—oysters chargrilled and fried, shrimp, gumbo, po'boy with three meats and gravy, crawfish, the works.

5. Dodged a bullet this morning. While we walked to school, Ben was just starting to tell me who the nine Jedis are from Star Wars: The Clone Wars and who reports to whom—and quizzing me! holy crap, I'm supposed to remember them each time he tells me?—but then he spotted his best friend and took off running. If I were a superior mom, I'd spend the day studying up and memorizing the Clone Wars characters...but I am merely a good mom.

Calling all car geeks

I've been holding off on buying a Prius because I think it's an ugly car. I don't like its back end at all. I much prefer a standard (yet sleek!) sedan look.

I just saw an ad for the Ford Fusion Hybrid. 41 mpg city? That's not as good as the Prius, but it's a midsize sedan (which is what I'm used to after nine years in a VW Passat) with better mileage than the hybrid versions of the Camry and Accord. And it looks kinda cute.

Consumer Reports rated the non-hybrid Fusion a good bit lower than its top-rated midsize sedans, but still calls it "recommended." It costs about $27,000 for the hybrid model, and if we buy right now (before March 31), there's a $3,400 federal tax credit waiting for us.

Is this the car for me? Is there any reason to avoid the Fusion Hybrid? Tell me, o car geeks!