Sunday, July 03, 2005

Hey, cooter wandees, know what's worse?

Many of us girls have been so lucky as to undergo transvaginal ultrasound, or what some folks call "gettin' speared with the cooter wand."

The project I'm editing right now pertains to urology, and I just learned about a test doctors do for fellas with prostate trouble: rectal ultrasound, in which the cooter wand becomes a heinie wand. (Yikes!)

Urologists have many tricks up their collective sleeve. They've concocted voiding cystography as well, in which the patient is injected with a contrast dye and then basically x-rayed WHILE PEEING.

Although that's nothing compared to what I read about back in the day when I handled a book on gastrointestinal radiology: defecography. It's a lot like voiding cystography, but with #2 instead of #1. (I will never forget the key piece of equipment: "a radiolucent commode." That steel toilet's just gonna hide the action; better to go with plastic.)


Mona Buonanotte said...

I enjoy the cooter wand, as you know. (Freakishly enjoy it.) I don't know if I could do the butt wand, at least not in a lab setting. If they let me take it home, though, I could crack open a bottle o'lube and give it a try, though (with Sergei guiding the way, 'cause...hey!...I can't see back there!).

Bored Housewife said...

jeeez....if I didn't have the cooter wand on a full bladder, I'm fairly sure I would have enjoyed it...Mona???? If you get off on it, through the pain of them pressing it against your overly full bladder, YOU win the prize for weirdest fetish EVER. That stuff's no fun. so finally they just let me pee and did a regular one. effers.

Psycho Kitty said...

I am sort of wishing I got off on it, since I have to have a little personal time with the damned thing next week. Sadly, our relationship is not it seems it could be. Hmm.