Have nothing good to say. It's spring break, so Ben-free time is at a premium this week. I.e., it is nonexistent.
Found the following gem of a subject line in my spam folder (which I actually check daily just in case there's something legit that has been shunted there by mistake. Like the note from the writer who wanted to interview me for my college alumni magazine...but that was back in December. Not sure anything juicy has been wrongly assigned to my spam box since then):
Sowing its clams under the worlds foreskin
I find that oddly intriguing.
Your assignment: Say something clever about two or more of the following: spring break, spam, magazines, clams, foreskin, and intrigue.
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8 comments:
Spam tastes like foreskin.
I have nothing clever to say, but I'm wondering if I can use "Clams, Foreskin, and Intrigue!" as the tag line on my masthead...
I have not filed for trademark protection for the catchphrase, "Clams, Foreskin, and Intrigue," so I think it's fair game. But Feral, won't you consider "Spam tastes like foreskin" for your dissertation?
"It was the first day of spring break, back in 19__. I was sipping coffee and browsing the ads in my favorite magazine, Martha Stewart Cooks with Spam. The intrigue began with a loud knock at the door. …"
"… Sadly, gentle reader, I am not at liberty to tell you more about the events that transpired. It must suffice to say that I now cherish my hard-learned lesson."
"Never place your foreskin by a clam."
(BTW Orange, anyone who directs other parents to the Dora spoof cannot be a terrible blogger. Many thanks!)
The surf withdrew it's lacy, spume-knitted sheet from the beach, taking the last shreds of evidence with it. Nothing was left behind to tell the world of the two lovers' tryst there now except a very confused clam and a tiny shred of foreskin, but that's a story for another time.
And now, the news.
i know nothing about foreskin, as a queer woman with neither sons nor brothers, but i do know something about clams remind me of foreskin.
"He brought me breakfast...spam and clams wrapped in an old newspaper. I looked up from the airline magazine, intrigued with the offering, and the opportunity for a very exciting spring break."
Foreskin...well, that's a different story.
One thing you could say about it: It was rarer than a foreskin on a clam.
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