Monday, May 08, 2006

Blatherskite

(Groovy etymology for that word, by the way.)

My mom did end up babysitting on Thursday so Mr. Tangerine and I could go out to dinner for our 15th. We walked to an Italian joint and had rather disappointing food. Also, the dinner menu was riddled with typos. Not ridiculously so—it's not as if they're selling mescaline salad like some places claim to do—but if you're the proprietor of an Italian restaurant that's been in business for over a decade, wouldn't you know how to spell tortellini? (Hint: It's not "tortalloni.") Then we hit the grocery store after dinner (so romantic!) and took a cab home.

Friday morning was Ben's show at school. The salute to Hollywood was a raging success, and I'm certain that we were not biased in pronouncing Ben's class's performance to be the best one. He looked fantastic as a junior cowboy—very Brokeback Kindergarten. Several people even thought the tall girl he was partnered with for the dance was a boy, further enhancing the Brokeback vibe. Ben had a grand time, and said he wished they could put on a show every day. Sure, there were probably about 1,000 watching him, but that didn't faze him. Not a shy boy.

Saturday morning, my cousin and I embarked on the ovarian cancer walkathon. (The donation site is still up if you wanted to chip in but were afraid you'd missed your chance. And vielen Dank to those of you who donated! The money is sorely needed, as breast cancer beats ovarian cancer by a mile in the race for funds.) Now, last year, the walk route was 3 miles if you walked two laps of the route, so we just did 1.5 miles last year (one of us had asthma acting up). We fully planned to do the same this year, and wouldn't you know it? The event organizers changed the route so that there was no opting out at the halfway point. We were suckered into doing 3! After the walk, we had lunch (Italian again, but much more satisfying than my anniversary dinner. Can you say "Godiva chocolate cake"? Can you stop salivating now? You can't? I know! It's good cake!)

Saturday afternoon, my cousin and I betook ourselves to an outlet mall. Yes, to walk some more! But for a good cause, again. I found three skirts, three tops, and two pairs of undies. Skirts with an elastic waist = the epitome of summertime comfort.

Today, the la famille Tangerine went bowling. And not no blue-collar bowling alley, nope. We went to an upscale "bowling lounge." One part bowling alley (I started typing "boweling alley"—what sort of facility do you think that would be?), one part pool hall, one part sports bar with many TVs, and two parts loungey bar with couches and whatnot. Ben bowled with the bumpers up to prevent gutter balls, while his parents faced the risk of rolling the ball directly into the gutters. We bowled three games, and I scored roughly 90, 60, and 80. That 60 was quite sad. (In my defense, I hadn't bowled in nearly a decade.) Afterwards, we visited the Lego Store to cash in some of Ben's birthday money. Dammit, now we have to build that giant police station. At least it's not one of the Star Wars things, like the Death Star with more than 3,000 pieces (ages 16 and up!).

Speaking of Star Wars, Ben and his dad have been playing this Lego Star Wars video game together. Ben's never seen any of the movies, but he's becoming moderately well-versed in the characters. Do you know how disheartening it is to hear him discuss the pros and cons of Darth Vader, Darth Maul, and Jar Jar Binks? Oy vey. I know kids are prone to such obsessions, but why can't my kid be obsessed with...reading? Or crossword puzzles? Star Wars and Legos...sigh.

Commenting assignment: Tell me a lie about your experience with mescaline, bowling, and/or Godiva chocolate, dear readers.

18 comments:

Anonymous said...

have you been to cancerbaby's? her friend has posted.

--a loyal lurker

Orange said...

Thanks for the heads-up, friendly lurker.

Mona Buonanotte said...

I've read about mescaline, I bowled a 98 last time I tried, and I would love to bathe in a tub of Godiva chocolate. I used to be on the company bowling team a million years ago, where my average was somewhere around 130. And now my kids out-bowl me. Que sera sera....

Becky..Absent Minded Housewife said...

I've tried convincing my 12 year old son that the newer three star wars movies are NOT remakes of the older three star wars movies. I cannot get him to actually watch the first three because...gasp...they are on VHS!

E. said...

Orange, I love how you always make us work.

Never tried mescaline, but I could tell you stories about my summer of mushrooms back at the start of grad school. Handy hint: bake them into pizza. Much more palatable than trying to hork them down plain (ick!)

Godiva: during my European experience in college, I found myself in Brussels and excitedly made my way to the Godiva store. I was disappointed. Too creamy and effete for my palate. Of all the chocolate I ate in Europe (and I spent a month in Switzerland, eating at least a bar a day), my favorite was the chocolate in Budapest. It was dark, gritty, a little rough. That's how I like it. You learn a lot about yourself traveling.

Emma Goldman said...

I can only claim to have eaten peyote (out of which mescaline is synthesized), and actually liked it. It tastes terrible, and the other alkaloids in it aren't all that nice, but it was fun.

I haven't gone bowling in a long time, but I have organized bowling expeditions (in grad school). What with the handball and the lifting of the sheet pans these days, I expect my extra muscles would improve my score some.

I'm a fan of the Belgian Chocolatier . . . Orange, you should definitely check him out.

amusing said...

Bowling is very satisfying when the ex is being a jerk....crash! bang! smash!

I gave up mescaline for chocolate that I inject directly...sometimes I just hook up a Hershey's syrup IV drip...

JT said...

I've never done mescaline, so no comment on that.

I adore bowling. It's so goofy and satisfying. I definitely score better when I drink while I bowl. However, no fancy lounges for moi -- I prefer dark, musty old places with a jukebox (check out Timber Lanes).

Godiva is yummy indeed. Ever had a Godiva chocolate martini?

Lisa said...

I am made of Godiva chocolate.

No? How about...I once posed as Lady Godiva? (or at least I would like to!)

Psycho Kitty said...

Oh, fine. Don't put on the list the things I could actually talk about--6-year old boys and their crazy SW/Lego obsessions.
THAT I could write a novel about.

Orange said...

Mona, that'd be a helluva bath! Would you use Comet or Soft Scrub to clean the tub afterwards?

Becky, making a child watch movies on VHS in the DVD era is tantamount to child abuse. Abuse, I say! A kid refusing to watch three movies he'd eat up with a spoon because they're on VHS, though? Eh, his loss. Someday he will actually see those movies, and he'll wish he'd watched them earlier, and he'll see that his abusive mother was...right.

E., I hate mushrooms on pizza, so that one's definitely out. Do the Hungarians sell any of this gritty chocolate stateside?

Emma, where do I find the Belgian? Is this the shop on Main Street near Chicago Avenue?

Amusing, brava! You have told me a lie about mescaline and chocolate, as assigned. Unless...you have really devised a safe way to mainline chocolate? Is it true?

JT, martinis are generally a bit much for me. I had a bourbon and Diet Coke while bowling, and it was like drinking cough syrup—why, I had to force myself to finish it...

Lisa, Godiva should sell solid dark chocolate Lady Godivas. With none of that hazelnut cream nonsense in it.

PK, you could always lie. Or hijack the thread with Star Wars and Legos. (I began building the Lego City police station yesterday. It comes with two criminals! Gotta have someone to put inside the jail, after all. Otherwise we'd be jailing construction workers and firemen (and they are all men—why is that?).

Emma Goldman said...

Yup--that's where it is. Well worth the trip, I say.

The Curmudgeon said...

Bowling. To my mind that was an expensive adjunct to drinking -- but the local bowling alley was the only place we could get served when were in high school. Many, many moons ago.

I have nothing to offer on the other topics. Sorry.

Orange said...

Curmudgeon, you could always make something up. That was, in fact, the commenting assignment: "Tell me a lie." Everyone (except Lisa and amusing) seems so honest!

DoctorMama said...

Here's a lie: mescaline, bowling and Godiva chocolate are bad for you.

Mushrooms on pizza are disgusting. So slippery and gray. Maybe shrooms are different, though.

Not a lie: I did mime in junior high. I know! I know! But: I came up with a great performance piece called "The Trials of Lady Godiva."

Happy anniversary. Ours is tomorrow -- only five years, though.

Feral Mom said...

Whoa, that wasn't a hole in your bowling ball? Sorry. Guess that was the mescaline-laced Godiva chocolate probing. And speaking of work, what sadist is giving out word verifications tonight?
zsewqwmb

Orange said...

Mushrooms = evil.

Mime? You know, I once sat next to a woman on the bus who claimed to have been the manager for Robert Shields of Shields and Yarnell fame...

Happy 5th to DoctorMama and her TrophyHusband! (Who has a great smile...)

the nut said...

I can hijack the thread by talking about the fact Peanut and I (mostly I) have beat that Lego Star Wars game already. It really is a cool game and we had a lot of fun playing together. Working as a team is not Peanut's strong point though and often I would make my sister come in and help me. Peanut often when somewhere on his own and hey, when 2 people are hooked into the game, 2 people need to work together. My niece and Peanut weren't allowed to play it together but in small increments because they started yelling at each other. Mainly because they both wanted to be "first" even though there is no "first" in that game. So much for teaching them about teamwork eh?

As for bowling - it's boring to me. I bowl 1 frame and I'm ready to go. Mescaline is something I stay away from 'cause I just have no need to go bonkers. And most of Godiva chocolates are too chocolatey for me. Give me toffee sticks (think Skor) or caramels and I'm good to go.