Monday, March 27, 2006

Orange ascending

Hey, hey! I'm pleased with how I did at the crossword tournament. Those of you who know who I am can find my name in the rankings, and those of you who don't can continue wondering. (I like a degree of anonymity, I do. But I was kicking ass and taking names.)

I had a great time, and spent scarcely any time in my hotel room. There was carousing to carry out, maximal mingling, a soup├žon of drinking, extended social intercourse...plus crossword puzzles. Who has time to sleep, or watch TV, or unpack? I hung out with some of the folks who were at Sundance in January, caught up with other old internet-based friends, met plenty of new people, chatted with drunken individuals both charming and off-putting. (This one broad was taller than me, and she kept looming into my personal space in a drunken stupor. I don't object to drunken stupors—just don't be a space-invading close-talker who smells like an ashtray. You know what I'm saying?)

I have always found myself to be utterly unaware of any direct ogling of my bosom. It must happen from time to time, but either I'm oblivious or I inspire a subtle approach. But at one of the parties, my rack was overtly ogled by a leader in the crossword field, who at least was forthright enough not to deny it. It was...odd. I daresay I prefer the covert ogle.

I met "Jeopardy!" ├╝berchampion, Ken Jennings, who was competing at the tournament. He did quite well for a rookie...but not as well as I did in my first year at the tournament. I ranked way ahead of him. (Hah! Bragging rights! Who needs $2.5 million anyway?) He was a little taller and cuter in person, and seemingly not at all insufferable. He had thoughtful remarks in his speech at the awards luncheon, and he was the one reading off names of all the prize winners (a certain citrus fruit included).

You want to know how smart the tournament crowd is? I think there were about a dozen people there who've been on "Jeopardy!" before, and there will assuredly be more. Ain't that cool? If you're not quite geeky enough to appreciate that, then frankly, I'm not sure why you even read my blog. Seriously.

Also, Wordplay will be opening in NYC on June 16, LA on June 23, and in roughly the top 25 markets on June 30 (Fourth of July weekend). If you live in a top-25 city, tell your friends! Those opening-weekend box office numbers are crucial, you know, and if the movie doesn't do well then, then those of you in smaller markets won't get a chance to see it in your area. So if you're in a big city, go see the movie on opening weekend! Take the opportunity to ogle my rack from the privacy of your plush movie seat!

13 comments:

Midwestern Deadbeat said...

Oh my God, you totally kicked ass!!! Congratulations!

Dammit, it's safe to say that DM is not a top-25 city. Guess I'll have to continue imagining your rack....

E. said...

I feel certain that I am not in a top 25 market either. So, all you big city folk: go see Wordplay so that it will come to my town. Even if you don't really want to see it, buy a ticket, go off and do something else, and enjoy that philanthropic sensation for a couple of hours.

I have a well-shaped but quite modest rack (really too small probably to qualify as a rack), and even I find my tits being stared at every so often. Tits are fascinating. But I agree: Covert ogling is the way to go. It's an issue of etiquette.

Cricket said...

The jugs got a gander! You made that movie for a reason. I did request Wordplay a few months ago at the local indie house, but I'll put in a plug again.

Congrats on those citrusy good results. You exceeded your expectations.

Sergei C. said...

Wow - good job!

Ken / Cazique said...

congrats again, you're making your way to the big three. it was nice to meet you in person, albeit briefly.

Mona Buonanotte said...

Hooray for you! And thanks for the Francis thing...I totally owe you!

Maybe you need to post a picture of said rack, just so we can ogle and comment.

Orange said...

Thanks, y'all. And check the tournament standings again—they've changed, or are in the process of changing...

Nancy Dancehall said...

Congratulations! I'll have to see if Wordplay is scheduled to play Denver.

Ellen said...

There's a famous family picture of my sister wearing the dress I wore during the finals (it's a hand-me-up), holding then-baby Joel, looking particularly well-endowed. We call it the "booby picture." I don't think the dress did enough for me to cause any ogling, though.

My brain has always been the main attraction, not any body parts.

Mignon said...

You Go!! I'm strangely proud of you. Does that sound condescending? I hope not. You are refreshingly unpretentious considering how smart you are.

Dharma said...

Well I have no idea where you actually places, but I am deciding quite high. As to oogl'ing your rack, I'd be honoured to, but how will I know it's you in Wordplay???? {sigh} I guess I will have to just dream.

Emma Goldman said...

You rock!

Psycho Kitty said...

Holy shite, you kicked ass, you! Yay! (But I still love Sudoku, sorry. It isn't challenging, it's sooooothing.)