Lemme put it to a vote: How much would you expect to spend on each of the following gifts?
Wedding (nice reception)
Wedding (low-key, reception at home)
High school graduation
Kid's birthday gift
(You'll note that Valentine's Day isn't listed. I bought some Tiffany crystal beer mugs. I think they're my gift to Mr. Tangerine and his gift to me. Holiday, shmoliday. I don't even get riled up about expecting a card any more.)
I'm asking about the gift amounts because a cousin of mine got married overseas, and I was not among the relatives who opted to travel to the wedding. The reception, such as it is, is an hors d'oeuvres–only open-house deal at my aunt's house, food made by the bride's mom and sister. My sister and I don't know what the standard expectation is these days. So?